Wait…you mean women AREN’T property??

With XOJane gone, it seemed only natural that some site, somewhere, would pick up their “It Happened To Me” beat — but who would have thought that site would be the MRA/PUA/SOB site “Return of Kings?” Up on their front page right now is the article…tragicomically titled “I Was Attacked By An Elderly Swedish Woman For Putting My Girlfriend In Her Place,” in which contributor William Adams recounts the harrowing tale of how a 50-year-old (old as the hilllls!) woman confronted him when he was merely standing on the street, yelling at his girlfriend about how she needs to listen to him. Un…fair?

You may know them as “Men’s Rights Activists” (MRA)…which is certainly shorter than “Assholes Who Believe They’re God’s Gift To Women…And That Women Should Worship Them As Such.” This “harrowing tale” of being accosted by “An Elderly Swedish” woman is a fair bit different than one might suspect. Given that it’s written by an MRA…well, no, he still comes off as an arrogant asshole whose girlfriend deserves far better.

“William Adams”- probably a pseudonym; most MRAs don’t have the balls to be honest about who and what they are- seems to be a real piece of work. He lives in “a bizarre and misogynistic alternate reality that is completely divorced from the actual world the rest of us live in.” How he even has a girlfriend defies rational understanding…unless the woman in question is totally devoid of self-esteem.

If you are not familiar with Return of Kings from our various jaunts to the manosphere, it is at this point that I should probably explain that these dolts….think they are “kings” and that women are supposed to treat them as such, so it is very upsetting for them when they find that their behavior is not actually considered acceptable by normal people.

Adams’ essay, apart from being just this side of a literary atrocity, is a stunning journey through the consciousness of an MRA who believes himself to be a superior being.

It starts out poorly…and manages to go down hill from there.

He starts out by talking about how he was mad at his girlfriend because she wanted to leave an outing with his friends early because she was drunk, that she wanted to take a cab for the same reason, and then that she dared to ask him for his coat when he had competed in some kind of Tough Mudder-esque competition earlier that day.

“She then consequently asserted that she wanted to borrow my (stylish) jacket, but I was annoyed and didn’t want to lend it to her in that particular situation. The same day I had competed in the Tough Viking contest, which consists of 15 kilometers of running and about 30 more or less physically demanding obstacles. The competition includes swimming and wading in fairly cold water, as well as crawling through thick layers of mud. I thought that if I can do that then she could walk a short distance and realize what it feels like in a very light version.”

So rather than display a modicum of kindness and consideration towards his girlfriend, Adams (as any self-respecting MRA would do) demands that she RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH!!

But, hey…his jacket WAS stylish, no?

Not to fear, gentle reader…for we are only just beginning to get a glimpse of what an unreconstructed, unapologetic dick Adams is. Again, how he even HAS a girlfriend…well, your guess is as good as mine.

Additionally, I thought that if she occasionally associates with my male friends, then she should talk to us on more equal terms and not be afraid of some realtalk. So while listening to her complaints I raised my voice and semi-yelled that if she would have listened to me in the first place we would not have to walk outside and would already be home by now.

It’s at this point our intrepid hero, The Elderly Swedish Woman ©, enters our story. And Adams is offended that she didn’t immediately and unequivocally take his side.

I know, right?? The NERVE of some people….

Meeting us on the sidewalk, then about 200 meters from home, a middle-aged woman suddenly shows up. She stops next to me and starts yelling directly in my face. Although she looks normal, she unhesitatingly manifests her dislike for my behavior.

And Adams had seemed such a thoroughly detestable likeable misogynist prince of a guy until now, right??

My girl has started to cry a bit, not atypical behavior for her subspecies. This is about to get worse, I thought, in the glimpse of an eye.

The 50-something bitch sees this and engages in another attack, after I have tried to walk past her in an attempt to ignore and move on. She threatens to “wrestle me to the ground” and calls me an “ass hat,” all while standing two inches from me, looking hostile. She refrains from doing so but does not listen when I stress that it is neither her nor anyone else’s business, and the entire situation is taken out of context too for that matter.

“Not atypical for her subspecies?” At this point, y’all should be repeating after me:


Granted, the situation may not have, strictly speaking, been the business of The Elderly Swedish Woman ©, but sometimes a person feels compelled to defend someone being bullied. And Adams, if nothing else, does seem to be the textbook definition of a bully.

My admiration for The Elderly Swedish Woman © is boundless, if for no other reason than calling Adams an “ass hat,” an English colloquialism generally employed to describe a person possessed of an unpleasant and/or objectionable personality. Based on what we’ve learned so far, that would seem to fit Adams, no?

The thing is that she was absolutely, 100% spot on. I have to admire her moxie in threatening to wrestle Adams to the ground. I suspect she would have easily taken two out of three falls from our intrepid “ass hat.”

Clearly, The Elderly Swedish Woman © is a USDA Grade A Prime #BADASS who should be in some sort of Badass Hall of Fame. Unfortunately, her attempt to edumicate Adams as to the reasons while she called him an “ass hat” are completely lost on The King.

The “conversation” continues for another five to ten minutes and like Gandhi I stoically remain calm. She gabbles her last feminist tenets, hugs my girlfriend, and suggests that she should leave me. Her mission is almost completed. The woman then adds that there is still something good in me and I do not have to be an ass hat. I can change. Then she left. Probably I will remain an ass hat, though, at least as it is understood from the lens of a Cultural Marxist madame.

As if my gentle reader hadn’t surmised by now that Adams truly IS an irredeemable “ass hat,” his self-referential comparison to Gandhi is…well, let’s just say laughable, ‘kay? So convinced is he of his rectitude and moral superiority to the emotionally overwrought distaff half of the population that he refers to The Elderly Swedish Woman © as a “Cultural Marxist madame.”

Goodnight. Game over. Drive home safely, eh? How could anyone hope to refute such sound and solid logic?

I’ll leave the question of why his girlfriend DIDN’T leave him for those inclined to ponder such mysteries of the universe. My purpose is to try to understand why Adams didn’t feel inclined to listen to The Elderly Swedish Woman ©, who was trying to school him on how to respect a woman.

Perhaps that’s the problem, though. Perhaps “respect a woman” is well beyond the meager understanding of MRAs like Adams, who clearly views women as property and thus must be kept in their place.

Perhaps it’s my own failing in that I can’t wrap my head around the Men’s Rights movement. Being an MRA seems on the surface to be a license to treat a woman poorly. MRAs view women as simply a means of obtaining sexual satisfaction, with little utility outside that basic function.

Beyond that, women are expected to make babies, manage the household, and defer any decision-making to the superior wisdom and intellectual capabilities of their man.

The arrogance behind such an attitude is stunning.

The comments to Adam’s post are priceless, in that they make you wonder what self-respecting woman would allow themselves to be within five miles of such an arrogant, self-absorbed jackass.

This is secondarily a question of being childish and not trusting a man to make proper decisions, and primarily about how to respond to anti-male attacks.

Uh…no; this is a question of being an “ass hat” and not treating a woman as an equal partner in a relationship. This is a question of what happens when you treat a woman as property. More than that, it’s a question of why ANY self-respecting female would want to be in the same time zone as an MRA.

Surely, they can do better than these misanthropes??

And then there was the comment from the never-imitated nor duplicated noted rape advocate Roosh V, who as far as anyone knows, may still be living in his mother’s basement:

Better you were confronted by a grandmother than the police. As long as a woman can call 911 when her feelings are hurt, we are not able to exert our pimp hand (short of violence) to train or punish her in the appropriate way. This is why it’s a good idea to record any fight you have with a girl. A simple tablet left on the kitchen table can do the trick.

A few years ago, I read The Game by Neil Strauss, which detail the author’s efforts to infiltrate the pick-up artist (PUA) community. It was a fascinating (and truly revolting) look into the world of men whose Prime Directive is to sleep with as many women as possible. It’s a numbers game…with “game” meaning exactly that. Women aren’t viewed as people, but rather as challenges to be conquered. The ultimate goal is to get a woman into bed, get yourself off, and exit stage left post haste. Period. A woman is neither a partner nor even a human being; they’re a puzzle to be solved and then, that challenge having been met, to be cast aside.

If you interested in the subject (why would you be?), I’d suggest reading The Game. It left me feeling as if I needed a long, hot shower to scrub off the scum. Unable to relate to women as equals, and very often frustrated by their unsurprisingly futile attempts to date women, they’ve decided to play “the game” on their own revolting, objectionable turns.

If you’ll excuse me, I feel an almost unbearable need for a hot shower….

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